Supermom...super power: Invisibility

And when I say invisibility I don't mean the kind that makes stains disappear from clothes. Or the ability to magically make a sink full of dirty dishes vanish when the head of the PTA knocks on your door. I'm talking about that fine line between being a wife, a mother and not losing who you are as a person. It is far too easy to disappear in the daily routine. The endless parade of dirty mouths, hands, and bottoms that need to be wiped. Sippy cups that need to be filled, beds to be made, floors to clean, meals to cook, and before I know it the day is over and I haven't taken 5 minutes for myself. And I begin to feel invisible. That I'm not seen for me, but rather for what I do. It's not easy to find time for yourself. Believe me, I know. I took the kids to McDonald's the other day for lunch. We all ate, then they were off to play and I kicked back and read a book. A lady sitting next to me watched me for a while then she finally said, "wow...you must only have one child! I've never been that relaxed as a parent." And to look at her, I would agree. She looked frazzled, tired, and to me, unhappy.

So how do you balance the demands of motherhood, being a wife and being a person? Take 10! that's my motto. I had to learn how to think smaller. Before I had kids it was no big deal to take a few hours and enjoy some retail therapy. But I can't do that now. I used to try to wait until I had an hour or so before I took some time for myself, guess what? I ended up waiting...and waiting. Because finding a large block of time when you have kids can be difficult. I would end up frustrated and feeling, well...invisible. So I'm learning to take 10 minutes here and there for myself. It may be simply to be in a room alone. Paint my toenails. Check facebook or write on my blog. It is so easy to lose our identity when we become parents. I have become known as Alex and Ava's mom. I have a name?! Marriage and family means carving out a new place for ourselves, but it doesn't mean we have to lose our identity or worse yet become invisible. But sometimes we allow that to happen. We stop doing the things we used to do. We forget about the hobbies we had before we got married and had kids. Now I realize that there have to be changes, obviously. But I have recently rediscovered my love for reading. And I'm starting to get back into writing and taking pictures again. I had put all that aside with the excuse that I didn't have time anymore. Make time. It's important. Not only for you, but for your kids as well. If you are happy, and fulfilled it shows. You will be a better wife, a better mother and a happier person. My sister said one time, that it's not about how clean the house is, or whether dinner is on the table when her husband comes through the door, it's coming home to a happy wife. And you know what? She's absolutely right. So if taking time out of your day to read for a little bit means that there are dirty dishes in the sink when your honey gets home, but you're happy and relaxed. I guarantee he won't notice the dishes!!!